Just Broken Up? Here's How To Help Yourself Cope
Did you just get dumped and now all you can think about is how to get back at your ex? Do you think that it's unfair for your ex to leave you and you didn't even get the chance to explain yourself? He never even attempted to listen to your side of things. All they did was get up and go.
You now keep thinking what to do now. You start to wonder how are you going to get your ex back. Well there are some things for sure you are not going to do such as try and make your ex jealous, or hurt them, well nothing bad like that. When you do these things it all stems from succumbing to the anger and hurt that you are experiencing. There's a better way of handling things.
You know what they say: don't get mad, get even!
Try and hide your emotions
At this moment in time you are feeling vulnerable, miserable, restless and anxious. As your ex has ended it with you of course it is only natural to be feeling hurt. So rather than letting everybody know about your emotions, it is wiser to hide it from your ex-partner. Talk to a few select girlfriends, your sisters or your mum but there is no need to pour your heart out to your work colleagues and that guy you sit next to on the bus! Control your inner feelings of hurt and you'll feel better about yourself and the control you have over the ending of the relationship.
This will give your ex the impression that you do also think it is high time for a break up and that you also need space. You can also show your ex that you do not need to depend on them and that you are more than capable in surviving without them. No doubt your ex is waiting for you to fall apart but you can get back at them by showing them this is not going to happen to you. This will also make you feel better – you can take care of yourself as in independent woman.
Start coping with the relationship breakdown
It's hard to cope with a breakup but you need to do it. You can feel sorry for yourself or you can find ways to start coping. Possibly the relationship is not completely over. If you are thinking of getting your ex back and this is what you seriously want and it is meant to be then there are ways. But right now, it's meant to be over.
You need to give the impression that you're coping so that you won't look desperate or needy. Of course, you do not want your ex to be seeing you falling all apart. You need to appear strong and composed. When you do this your ex will wonder whether it was a good idea that you did break up.
Don't be bitter that you aren't together
Even though you are really upset, you cannot let all this get to you. If by chance you do see your ex, don't try and pretend that you did not see them. They might sight this and will feel smug inside that you find it hard to face them. Better to face them and have a conversation of sorts, be polite and do not use the opportunity to “get back at them”. If you feel too upset to speak to him a nod or other acknowledgement is sufficient to make sure you are remaining polite.
Whatever you do, don’t give out any hints whatsoever that you would like to reconcile with them. It is better to not mention the relationship and simply just ask them how they have been. Also tell them that you are fine. There is a great chance your ex is expecting you to be angry or feel bitter towards them so do the exact opposite.
Improve yourself and you'll improve your self esteem in the process
Aside from improving your physical appearance, you can also improve certain behaviors. Sure, you're already good-looking but it doesn't hurt to get a new haircut or even start a workout program. If you are looking better than ever, what you are telling your ex is that you are doing really well.
Another way that you could get your ex back with is improving your behavior. When you do make improvements that states that you are accepting change. When your ex sees these changes they will be very impressed with you. It would be like looking at a new and improved you – the person that they once fell in love with.
So keep these pointers in mind, if you do want to get your ex back. Don't go overboard and make your ex jealous or hurt them emotionally. These techniques are for those who show maturity in themselves and want to get back at their ex and to feel so much better about themselves.
Even if it doesn’t work out and you never get back with your ex, it’s ok. You will have developed yourself – new hobbies, a new personal appearance or simply a new positive attitude towards life will benefit you enormously. Life is for living – good luck in living the best life that you can!