10 Things Not To Post Online After A Breakup

girl using laptopNewly single? If your relationship is over, the internet is not the place to promote your new found single status. Do not take to facebook, twitter or any other social media to diarise your break up and trash your ex. Whether you are a man or a woman, displaying a sense of social media decorum will stand you in good stead. Remember – once its online, it’s there forever.

We all know how hard a break up is – there are very few people in this world who have not had their hearts broken. In saying that this is almost a universal experience, we all know that there is light at the end of the tunnel. Behind closed doors do whatever it takes to get over your break up. Maintain a private profile when dealing with anyone who isn’t a close friend and the social media networks which are at our fingertips today.  If you want to post something use this rule of thumb, write it down and wait 24 hours. You will give yourself time to calm down.

Here are helpful tips on 10 things not to post on Facebook to keep you out of the public eye and your break up private amongst your closest friends rather than friends of friends of friends. While it may feel good to vent and complain about your ex online, more people than you think will see your posts.   

1.    Journal in private. The internet is not the place to document the emotional rollercoaster that you are on. Stay away from your computer or phone whenever you are tempted to chronicle the stages of your break up. The wider public – “share, like and comment” will spread your status further than you realise – really do not need to know. Remember that Facebook is not your diary it is a very public space.

2.    Sappy Break Up Song Lyrics are not good posts. Put them onto your iPod. Go jogging or for a walk or turn them up loud and cry while you do your housework.

3.    Facebook Profile Housekeeping. Yes, it may hurt but you need to take down the profile picture of you as a couple. Remove your relationship status and avoid changing it to “It’s Complicated” as this will just generate interest which will encourage people to comment and post on your wall. You want as little fanfare as possible. Before you delete every image of your ex on Facebook you should take a moment to consider – are these snapshots a record of you too? They are also your life, and in six months’ time you may want to look at them as a remembrance of your life, regardless of who else was standing beside you. Don’t be rash when you trash.

4.    Facebook Rebound – this one is an easy trap to fall into. Look how great I am doing – here is yet another photo of me with a cute member of the opposite sex. There are some very talented photoshoppers out there but avoid this trap. You should also avoid sexy posts on the walls of friends or other singles. Your efforts to make your ex jealous are transparent and do nothing to make you appear unsophisticated.

5.    You Are Not Will Shortz – leave cryptic messages and clues to the crossword puzzle editors and stop trying to drop mystery hints about your emotional state. Your ex wont waste time trying to puzzle them out and you only look silly.

6.    Keep Your Mutual Friends Out Of It. If you were dating for a long time chances are you have a lot of mutual friends on Facebook and otherwise. Don’t make mutual friends feel bad or have to defend their actions in regards to your ex. Do yourself a favour and hide statuses for a while.

7.    No Slander. No revenge posts. No airing dirty laundry. Ever. Repeat as required.

8.    Don’t Start An Online Conversation. Publically begging for your ex to return or to beg forgiveness is not classy. If you need to speak to your ex, do it in person.

9.    Don’t Use Your Photos or status posts to pass messages to your ex. Don’t try to announce you are having the best time ever and try to make them miserable. You shouldn’t be reading their wall anyway it will only upset you and delay your emotional recovery.

10.    Facebook Stalking. Just don’t do it. If you do find that you have checked your ex’s page don’t leave a record that you were there. Don’t comment or post a photo; don’t voice an opinion of his new life and activities without you. Best of all, simply don’t look at his profile.

Neil Sedaka got it right, breaking up is hard to do, but don’t make it worse by explaining to all and sundry using your online profile just how hard it is for you. Channel your inner Audrey Hepburn and demonstrate class and good manners. No matter what you may think behind closed doors, the best public profile is one of silence regarding your break up, even if your ex is behaving badly.

Do you have more suggestions on what not to post to Facebook? Comment below

 

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